by: Migelle
I remember my first valentine like it happened yesterday. It was during 7th grade. It was from my soon-to-be first boyfriend. It was like nothing else though it may not be what you think.
February 14, 2014. It was supposed to be like any other day for it was a time where self-identity and self-worth were not part of my vocabulary. Like any other teen filled with angst and confusion, I believed that I was a person incapable of having a relationship let alone receive a valentine.
I was sitting by myself finishing a requirement in a certain subject when I heard murmurs behind my back. I ignored it for a while because I was determined to finish the said project but curiosity got the best of me. I decided to know what was happening behind me. There, I saw him. I have been liking this boy for quite some time now and seeing him there, with flowers on his left hand and chocolates on his right left me in awe. I was paralyzed. I remember the whole class giggling and shouting like typical classmates whenever situations like this occur. I knew they were shouting but silence filled my head. It is as if sound and time stopped at the same time. He walked towards me with that smile of his and said "Happy Valentine's." He handed me the flowers and the chocolates. Seeing him up close and all near, I knew this was not Valentine nor relationship that was meant to be.
The flowers he gave were three beautiful red roses. However, they were all made from plastic. The chocolates were from an imported brand. If I was not mistaken, they were chocolates from Belgium. Unfortunately, the chocolate had nuts in it and I was allergic to nuts.
This valentine showed me a glimpse of my future relationship with him. Like the flowers, it all was superficial and shallow. I knew I made no effort in knowing him and he also made no effort in knowing me. We interacted in a way were we were reflecting the idea of love and not really true love. The chocolates can validate this alienation between us. If he had known me, he should not have bought that kind.
Fast-forward. The relationship did not go well. I knew about it from the start yet chose to ignore it. This taught me only one thing. If I was being honest from the time I received the flowers, I would have said no but like any other naive girl, I was blinded with the shimmer and glitter of infatuation mistaking it for love.