by: Jireh
Social Media had greatly influenced the viewpoints, perspective and impression of many people in almost all aspect of life. This is a medium of free flowing thoughts and communication that enables people to interact, connect and may be entitled to judge other people. I often had a glimpse of public posts that makes a stigma of expectation that every person “must” have. It seems like in a social media perspective, a relationship must be based on materialistic things, like a goal to surprise your partner, the goal to give flowers, the goal to eat on a fancy restaurant which in reality, not everyone can afford to have it. And if someone attempts to cheat, there’s a long rant with photo evidence awaiting to be posted. Sure you can share your insights about your life and have the freedom to let it all out. But that doesn’t mean there’s no limit and some things had come out of hand. Some are about trends such as fashion trends, food trends, or even make up trends. I watched hundreds of makeup tutorials and believe me when I say the definition of beauty now is based on how well can you pull off your make up. How well did you spread your foundation, how well did you make your brows on fleek, and how well did you blend your eyeshadow. I don’t hate make up, I put make up on occasionally. Yet this brought me grudges to hate myself for I think Im not socially accepted if I showed my true self without greasepaint mask on me. Why can’t people be beautiful without make up nowadays? Why can’t fat people be called beautiful? Why do we need to follow an ill-favoured standard based on judgment?
Thick thighs, Inflated stomach, awful scars, stretch marks, pimples, large shoulders. Name it, I have it. It’s normal for my family to have it, and I think it’s normal just before the society had judged me for showing myself. I’ve been called by many names, fat, pig, stout, pork, and flabbily. That led me to hate myself for a cruel society judging me for just being myself. They set up a standard of “body goals” that often means “body shaming “for others. They are so busy making theirselves perfect and seeing just the ugly side of other people just to make them feel superior. Pictures posted of a sexy woman wearing sleeveless and shorts would be pleasing and be given comments such as “beautiful, sexy, wow, slim, perfection” while when a flabby girl gets the chance to earn confidence in a long time to wear sleeveless and shorts comments of hatred will spread such as “you should’ve wore a long sleeve instead, yuck, ew, unpleasing” that degrades you and takes away your right to freely choose what to wear and freely accept yourself. Why do people have to send hate and be hypocrites? Why can’t they let others be happy just the way they are? Let us live the way we want to. And the society must understand the struggle and rigors of a person to truly accept who they are for theirselves and the struggle to earn admiration and begging to be loved by others.
The virtual world as we know it is built with lies, people full of pretentions hidden by a screen in front of their faces. I’m tired of pretending who I’m not. I’m tired of following the standards that the society has set for me. I’m tired of basing my life for the satisfaction of others. I’m tired of being judged physically, And Im tired of trying to fit into two worlds full of hate and cruelty. All these fats had made me unique and slowly, I know I’ll learn how to love myself more than anyone else can. These scars had formed who I am now. A mark from my past. Let’s stop the stigma, no one deserves to be hated just because they’re being true to theirselves. And no one deserves to be treated less than everybody else. Not just because you’re fat you’re unworthy to be loved. Someone’s going to see your worth and love you not basing on your physical appearance but based on the true self you can offer and that weighs worth so much more than the outer appearance because you will be secured with a genuine love given by a genuine person who’ll make you genuinely happy that’s for sure. And that’s the only goal to follow.
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